Flashback: 1984

Mary Lou Retton was in the building today. Some of you know where this bad story is headed.

I had a pommel-horse sized crush on her back when she vaulted into the hearts of Americans in the summer of 1984.

After she took gold, the endorsement line rang off the hook for the West Virginia native. I wrote to her fan club and got in return a 5x7 black-n-white postcard with her publicity headshot, her infectious smile and a cool-for-the-80s thumbs up.

With that vivacious personality of hers, she pitched batteries among other things. Energizer became the brand of choice for zitfaced early teens like myself. I even imagined her coming to the front door of my condo, stopping by to say what's up as if she was merely one of my around-the-way girls.

There's no real exciting end to this story. I just thought I'd make you laugh at my expense again with a tale of a queer crush from 20 years ago.