Larry Birkhead Sighting ... Three Years Ago

I was watching an episode of "Entourage" last summer when I saw a face that I knew was familiar.

"That dude is in the background of my favorite Dennis Hopper picture," I remember thinking.

Seriously, check out the photographer on the right. It's Larry Birkhead. He was at the Barnstable Brown Derby Eve Gala in 2004, and ruined this picture I took of Hopper. Anyway, yeah, that's the father of Anna Nicole's infant daughter, Dannielynn.

If Birkhead can shoot the same party I did in 2004 and by 2006 appear in a non-speaking part for four seconds on "Entourage," then can I perhaps expect a call soon when they start casting for "Arliss: The Musical?"

And regarding Dannielynn, which trailer park do you come from if you give your kid such a name? You just know she's going to be a stripper with a name like Dannielynn, before she of course changes it to Lexus or Cinnamon.

One last question -- When you accidentally impregnate a pill-popping dumbass alcoholic, don't you try hard as hell to prove you're not the father?